Where is my stand? Am i getting more n more.......

On sat, i went to east coast park with my fren. I would say i so damn happy!! Although i know that i will sweat and sticky bt i wouldnt mind coz i been wanting to go. Sitting on a tent and listening to MP3 and reading a book, u can do whatever you like. It is really nice to do! The wind at night is so windy and make mi feel fresh! Looking at the sky, with so many stars shinning, it reali make mi feel so relaxed and dump all my stress and unhappy thing aside. Thank my fren. Thank for granting my wish. You may not gt to see this msg, bt still i want to say.... My dear fren, do tke care yourself.

Recently been getting more and more tired. I would like to say sorry to my fren Huiling, i sorry that a few time whn i arrange to meet up with u, i didnt make it a point to meet up with u. I feel so gulity to it.I do agree with what huiling has said in her blog. Sometime i wont want to tell my problem to someone else who you dont wish to tell to. It may be sum1 who u fall for b4 or fren that u always meet up with. Mayb at time i would disturb fren wit things that i can share with

I been thinking a lot. Should i stay on or leave the place? Should i give up looking for a new enviornment? Coz sent out a few resume, but seem no reponse. Market seem going slow. Will i be able to do thing that i want to try? Is my working ability so suck or juz average?? I dont think i am up to the standard!! Y??? Cz of the CONFIDENCE!! Mine have been drain away by my working place. It reali make mi feel so useless and small in everybody's eye. Am i so stupid or because of not enough staff so they didnt take action?? Or am i being sensitive??

I do hate myself at times! The reason only i know. Nobody will know or will understand how i feel.....